Praying for your future husband as a single Christian woman sounds like a good idea, but before you fall to your knees and whisper, "Dear God, Please send me a godly man to be my husband," consider this;
Is this the kind of prayer single Christian women should be praying?
Maybe, maybe not. Let's take a look at both sides of the argument so that you can decide.
I've provided 3 prayers for your future husband at the end of this post that you can use when you're ready but first consider this...
When you're single and waiting for the one, it can feel like it's taking forever. That's why it can be extremely tempting to bombard heaven with your pleas for God to deliver the man of your dreams, or at least send you his tracking number.
But here's the problem...
...If you're a Christian woman, you've already got everything you need.
And His name is Jesus.
Now, that's not very satisfying when all you want to do is wake up beside a gorgeous man and cuddle a little bitty baby. Ladies, let me tell you, I know all about baby fever and how crazy it can make you feel.
The struggle is real!
So, if you're reading this, you're probably done waiting, and you're ready to fast and pray and do whatever it takes until you get that engagement ring on your finger.
Maybe you're also thinking about how fabulous you're going to look in that wedding dress after all that fasting.
Before you shut the door on your prayer closet, let me share with you some of the pros and cons of praying for your future husband.
First, let me warn you against the dangers of turning marriage or a man into an idol.
Any time we look to a person, a situation, or an institution to save us, instead of Christ, we have created an idol.
Idols come in many different shapes and forms. Sometimes, we lose sight of Christ because we're busy searching for His promises.
It's easy for this to happen. We often think that when we love God, He is obligated to give us the desires of our heart, but that's not exactly how it works.
If you're waiting for a man to come and save you from being lonely and frustrated, you're not yet ready to pray for a husband. What you really want can only be met through your relationship with Jesus Christ.
So when you're praying for your future, keep this in mind...
Our God is a jealous God, and He will not give you something He knows will take His rightful place in your heart.
Any time you turn a boyfriend or husband into your savior, you've created an idol. Because here's the truth that you have to know and understand deep down in your heart...
Intimacy, wholeness, and love are PREREQUISITES for marriage.
You don't get those things once you fall in love. You don't find them in marriage. Instead, you learn how to have them through the one and only true source, Jesus Christ.
Once you can experience those things in a relationship with Jesus, then and only then will you be able to share them with your husband through a covenant marriage effectively.
Many people argue that God doesn't guarantee you a husband, and to an extent, I would have to agree.
There are all kinds of examples of women who have been believing for marriage for years but are still single.
However, I do NOT believe that God withholds marriage from anyone who truly wants it. The problem is that sometimes we get in the way of our own blessings.
Usually, women remain single because they don't have the necessary relationship skills to make marriage possible.
Thankfully, we can take responsibility for those things and improve our opportunities to find and nurture the right relationship.
If you want to get married, and you want God to do a lot of the behind-the-scenes co-ordinating, there are definitely some things you can and should be doing while you're waiting.
For starters, don't put off living your life just because you're single. God does not want you to wait and save all your joy for when you're married.
Start living a joy-filled life today!
I get emails from so many women who are watching the years go by and wondering what's wrong with them because they're still not married.
They have so many plans for the future that are completely depending on being married.
Sadly they're saving all their praise and joy for someday.
Please... Don't do that to yourself.
There's absolutely nothing wrong with being single; in fact, from God's perspective, it's a gift.
And if you fail to recognize the blessings of the season you're in, you'll end up letting bitterness into your heart.
Let's be honest; bitterness is not an attractive quality, my friend. It doesn't look good on anybody.
When you're praying for your future husband, do so with a sense of appreciation for the stage you're at right now.
The Lord knows you and your story from beginning to end. He knows what you need today, and He knows what your future husband needs as well. Certain lessons need to be learned before you're able to appreciate what God has planned for you.
I'm incredibly grateful that my husband was married and divorced before he met me.
I am so blessed to be married to a man who has already gone through the pain and disappointment of a failed marriage and broken family.
His ex-wife has spared me so much frustration and heartache.
Seriously, if not for her, I don't know if my husband would be the man he is today. I don't know if I could have handled him when he was less mature.
Now, to be clear, I am in no way recommending that you set your sights on divorced men, and you should NEVER ever EVER have anything to do with someone who is in any way married.
Marriage is sacred.
One of the best ways to ensure that your marriage fulfills its greatest purpose is by honoring the sanctity of the marriages around you.
If he is separated, in the middle of a divorce, going to get a divorce or anything of that nature, HE IS STILL 100% MARRIED.
Do yourself a big favor and don’t go anywhere near a married man.
Steer clear of recently divorced men as well. Divorce is one of the most stressful events that can occur in anyone’s life. Don’t get caught up in that.
However, if you meet someone who has been through a divorce and comes out the other side, don’t write them off just because they had a life before you.
My point here is this; you might fall madly in love and be very happy with someone who is nothing like what you were expecting.
So if you're expecting things to work out a certain way, I want to encourage you to be open to what the Lord might be bringing into your life.
When I was younger, I never imagined that I would marry a divorced black man, simply because I grew up in one of Canada's whitest neighborhoods (seriously, I didn't even know a black person until I was in university).
Sometimes our expectations of who we'll marry are formed when we are very young, and they're based on circumstances and situations that we're destined to outgrow.
There's nothing wrong with praying for your future husband, as long as your doing it in a way that honors God and His sovereignty first.
Don't begin saying prayers for your future husband prematurely.
This isn't a prayer for teenage girls to recite for their teenage boyfriends.
The Bible clearly warns us not to awaken love before we're ready.
Think about the kinds of things you would pray over your husband if you were already married. Also, think about what you're praying over yourself.
As Christians, our number one priority should be to seek the Kingdom of God. So, pray that your future husband will seek the Kingdom of God above all else.
A prayer for your future husband:
Make him a man after your own heart. Give him the spirit of Wisdom to seek you above all else. To fear the and love the Lord. I know and trust that if he truly loves you with all his heart, mind and soul, he will be able and equiped to love me as your beloved daughter.
God must be our first love.
If we can get that right, everything else will fall into place.
That doesn't mean life will be a cakewalk, but it does guarantee that your eternal life will be established on a solid foundation.
As you're preparing for marriage, you've got to think beyond the here, and now, you've got to begin to consider the eternal life of your husband and children.
It's your responsibility to give your family the best possible chance of spending eternity together with the Lord.
Remember, God works in mysterious ways.
The man you're going to marry might not be saved yet. He might be going through some major challenges or setbacks.
We must all overcome something if we're ever going to get any place worth getting to. You might meet the right man before God is finished with him, and that's okay.
Just don't marry him before God is done with him.
One of the most attractive qualities anyone can possess is to be a man or woman of their word.
Jesus commands us, "let your yes be yes and your no be no."
If there's to be any hope of you being able to submit to your husband, you've got to be able to trust him.
Jesus submitted to the will of the Father because he absolutely trusted Him. If you want your husband to lead you and your household, you need to commit to marrying a man of integrity and pray for your future husband to grow in that area of his life.
Nothing is more painful than watching women try to force their men to lead.
Pray that your future husband will be a man who has a quiet confidence, through Christ, to do what is right, according to the will of God.
It's not enough to know God and know His will.
Even Satan has that going for him.
You've got to be able to act on what you know faithfully. In a stable, healthy marriage, both the husband and wife should be firm in their faith and able to stand firm against daily temptations.
Of course, this doesn't mean we will ever be perfect because obviously, we're not. But a good leader leads by example, not by words. He doesn't confess one thing with his lips and then turns around and do another.
A good husband will make mistakes and take responsibility for them.
Nothing takes more strength than the ability to forgive.
If you want to have a peaceful home, marry someone who recognizes that forgiving others is an act of courage and strength.
Marriage is a covenant between two faulty people and a perfect God. It's the single most important human relationship. Where two become one.
For that relationship to function at the highest level, both of you need to know how to forgive.
Forgiving one another isn't enough.
You'll also have to be quick to forgive everyone else who offends you.
Here's why, when you hold a grudge against others, eventually, that resentment and bitterness work their way into your home and contaminates everything, including your marriage.
Use this prayer for your husband, and pray that he learns the value of forgiveness and how to forgive early in life.
Help him learn to forgive others, and to leave judgement and condemation up to you. Help him to recognize that you alone are the only one capable of judging any of us. Give him the strength and courage to forgive others quickly and graciously.Amen
While there's nothing wrong with praying (as long as you have the right motives) for your future husband, it's even more important to pray for your future self.
God knows what you need before you ask. He knows who you're fantasizing about, and He had factored in all of your preferences before you even recognized them.
Praying for your future husband is good but preparing yourself for marriage is more important.
Become the woman who is prepared for the kind of man you're asking for.
Don't wait until you're in a relationship to figure out what makes a relationship work. You've got to do that work up front.
Failure to do so often results in disappointment and heartbreak.
There's so much to learn about what makes a covenant marriage work, and you should make every effort to study now.
After all, you don't want to wait until you're thrown in the deep end before you learn how to swim.
Begin preparing for marriage today.
You'll find tons of free information throughout this website to help Christian women like you prepare for marriage.
My goal is to apply ancient Biblical principles and Christ-centered truths to the modern dating world. I hope to empower single Christian women to date deliberately, court with confidence and pursue their God-given desire for marriage wholeheartedly.
If you would like some help getting started, check out my free relationship starter course.
Begin by knowing your true worth in Christ and loving yourself so that you can attract and love the right man.
When you put in the work, that day could be much sooner than you think.
In this FREE Course, you're going to learn:
I hope you’ve found this useful. If so, please share it on your favorite platform.
My goal is to help Christian women like you enjoy healthy thriving relationships, with God, yourself, and others. If you have any questions, thoughts, or opinions, I would love to connect with you in the comments below.
And I have a few questions for you…
Leave a comment below and let me know.
Share as much detail as you can. Your wisdom and insights will help and encourage readers from around the world. The ideas you share might be the inspiration someone else needs to get a breakthrough.
Important: Please share your thoughts, ideas, and opinions directly in the comments below. This way, everyone benefits, and the community grows.
Thank you so much for reading and supporting this growing community with your voice. It really matters to me, and it makes a huge difference in the Kingdom of God.